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Want To Become Successful? Do These 10 Things Immediately.
“Without continual growth and progress, such words as improvement, achievement, and success have no meaning.” — Benjamin Franklin
The best investment you will ever make is to invest in yourself.
Here are the top 10 lessons I’ve learned from mentors on how to achieve extraordinary success in your relationships, business, and to maximize productivity in your life.
1. Set A Specific Intention And Goal
“Our goals can only be achieved through a vehicle of a plan, in which we must fervently believe, and upon which we must vigorously act. There is no other route to success.” — Pablo Picasso
Setting an intention for a goal in your life will put you in tension.
Why? Because it usually means having to behave in a way that is different from your current habits. You will have to consciously override your habits, behaviors and stories in order to make progress towards that goal.
You need to stretch yourself.
And, if you have ever dabbled in personal development, you know stretching yourself is where all the magic happens.
All growth, and all progression occurs outside of your comfort zone.
2. You Have A Responsibility…So Get Out Of Your Own Way
“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, ‘Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous?’ Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won’t feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to manifest the glory of God that is within us. It’s not just in some of us; it’s in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.” — Marianne Williamson
This is where we need to acknowledge our imposter syndrome gremlin that can be awakened from her slumber at the prospect of change. Because her goal is to largely keep you small, safe, and secure.
My imposter syndrome gremlin, with her menacing smile, programmed self-doubt, and expertise self-sabotage often serenades me with thoughts like
“You are not smart enough”
“Who are you to even think you are making any sort of impact on your health?”
“You are waayyyyy out of your league”
“People are not going to take you seriously”
“Go home immediately. You don’t belong here”
Enter the panic.
The shallow, rapid breathing.
But, there is another side to this coin. And that is, I know I HAVE A RESPONSIBILITY to get my message out.”
Even if it is to help just one woman. To share some wisdom that helps to move the needle in her growth. It is absolutely my job as a doctor (which comes from the Latin word Docere, meaning “to teach”) My job is to teach, to get the information out there, and wherever it may land is exactly where it should.
All this to say, that this reframe of making it all about me (with my inner gremlin talking about how I am not good enough somehow) to making it all about them (and helping one person) tends to remove the biggest obstacle of all – which is ourselves.
So thank your inner gremlin for taking care of you, keeping you safe, and set on your path and doing what you are supposed to do….because it is your responsibility, in exchange for your time on this earth, to leave it a little better than the way you found it.
3. Move Like A Predator
“When a woman puts on a heel, she has a different posture, a different attitude. She really stands up and has a consciousness of her body.” — Christian Louboutin
I have always been a proponent of good posture, and how that can command a certain presence.
This includes the physicality of how you stand, how you move, walk, and talk.
Think of a jaguar, or a cougar or a panther. Beautiful curves, feline, and stealth. Deadly if you are their target.
Stand up straight.
Walk with purpose.
Be powerfully present.
Not only do I talk posture all day in clinical practice, but this has far reaching effects beyond the neurological implications of posture.
There is nothing more primal, that which can command more raw energy than a woman.
Think about childbirth.
Think about the mama bear, the tiger mama, the sheer unleashing of pure, unaltered power of a mother when she has to protect her children.
We see this in the wild, and we see this on the playground.
There is nothing more predatory, more primal, and more powerful for a woman to do than to harness and surrender to her feminine power.
So often we see women who climb the corporate ladder who look, walk, and talk like men because that is what we THINK we need to do.
So be ALL IN for harnessing and unleashing your feminine energy, and that of those around you.
That means acknowledge other people for the qualities you see in them, surrender to all of who you are, and support women along the way.
I have talked about the neurological differences between a man and a woman here, and this discussion on the physicality of presence was a perfect compliment to this.
4. Be Unapologetically You
“Every time someone steps up and says who they are, the world becomes a better place.” — Raymond Holt
This brings me naturally to this point. Be unapologetically you.
For me, that means I can (and should) simultaneously do a deep, cerebral dive in pathophysiology, and biology, whilst wearing makeup and gorgeous high heels.
Or that I can (and should) make quirky jokes with constant references to 90’s movies AND have insights into autophagy, protein deacetylation, and nutrient sensing pathways.
These 2 seemingly unrelated characteristics have often been pegged on opposite ends of a spectrum…but I am here to tell you that they can and do coexist.
It is OK, nay, encouraged, to be all of who you are.
Once I surrendered to this idea, not surprisingly, I met and connected with other women just like me.
Other women who were smart AF, rocking their businesses, who embraced and celebrated all of them.
The takeaway here for me was all of who you are. Without exception. Without apology.
How can you be more of you?
5. Acquire New Skills To Ascend To The Next Level Of Success
“Leadership is hard. It’s a skill. It’s a technique.” — Jocko Willink
If you have the desire to in being a leader in your space, this requires the constant evolution and acquisition of new skills.
It is NOT enough to optimize the skills you have.
It is essential to acquire and master new skills.
The skill set that you have learned and perhaps even optimized to get you where you are will not serve you in ascending to the next level.
In fact, these skills can even so far as to maim you in your efforts in ascension.
6. Seek Clarity
“Take advantage of every opportunity to practice your communication skills so that when important occasions arise, you will have the gift, the style, the sharpness, the clarity, and the emotions to affect other people.” — Jim Rohn
In the quest for clarity, first start by seeking clarity with yourself.
Ask yourself this question:
Who do I want to be in the future?
And the follow up questions would be — what are the skills, people, and habits I need to develop to become that person?
This can be applied in:
Your Business (what do I want my business to be in 5 years from now?)
Your Love Life (what do I want my relationship to look like in 3 months?)
Your Professional Skill Set (what do I want my skill set to be in a year?)
Seek clarity in the areas of your life that matter to you.
Congratulations, you are about halfway through my geeky magic carpet ride on the topic of success. The nerd in me loves and honors the nerd in you. Just a reminder that if you want access to more tools that can help you become successful as a Health Practitioner or Entrepreneur, click here! They’re free.
7. Demonstrate Courage
“Fear is peeing your pants. Courage is doing what you have to do with wet pants.” — Dan Sullivan
This for me is related to being more of you are, and you have a responsibility.
It is paramount that you understand the importance of standing up for yourself, your ideas, and the people around you that matter.
It would be far too easy to not speak on the truth I know.
To let bullies, uninformed muggles, and online haters direct my actions.
But that would not be courageous.
Standing up for your ideas and yourself is not only the right thing to do, but it develops self-trust, your courage, and resilience.
8. Busy Work Is Not Your Life’s Work
“Life is what happens while you are busy making other plans.” — John Lennon
Oh this one is juicy. Re-read this one a few times.
Another thing I have learned about being a high performer is that we spend at least 60% of our time in our zone of genius.
Meaning, what are the outputs in your life that matter the most and are you spending at least 60% of your time doing them?
Identify what those things are and then OBSESS about them.
Being busy is not the same as forward momentum. Maybe you answered 30 DMs, or responded to 100 emails today, or spent 2 hours on Facebook…but these are not the outputs that MATTER.
Your busy work is not your life’s work. Rearrange how you spend your time so that you are appropriating it to your genius
9. Surrender To Serendipity
“Your network is your net worth” — Porter Gale
Take the time to connect with people.
Be genuinely curious about other people, their stories, what they are doing, and how you can help.
Do you know anyone who is self made?
No, you don’t.
That is because no one is self-made.
And if someone tells you they are. They are lying.
Arnold Schwartnegger once famously said “it is not true that I am self-made. Like everyone, to get to where I am, I stood on the shoulders of giants.”
On the shoulders of giants.
We succeed by helping each other. It doesn’t need to be as grandiose or elaborate as a sacrificial lamb.
Help often comes in smaller, more useful bites.
It can be helping them gain clarity, giving them a useful idea, or just being a good human and giving them some of your precious time to help them sort through or support something.
The biggest luxury we have, that cannot be leveraged, is our time. Spend part of this precious currency on people you can help.
I have been on the receiving end of this and know first hand how much it is appreciated.
My mentors, some of which are arguably the most successful men and women in the high performance space, took me under their wings, mentored, advised, and have spent valuable time on helping me grow.
Time is valuable. It is another currency we trade in beyond financial currency, and it has an absolute value. My mentors chose to spend some of their precious resource (time) on me.
I want to do this for others, and to continue learning from those who have reached mastery.
A general rule of thumb I like to employ is to spend about a 1/3 of my time with colleagues who are just like me, 1/3 of people who are further ahead than me, and a 1/3 of people who are behind me.
A rising tide lifts all boats.
Be generous with your time.
You don’t have to know it all. You just have to be willing to help.
10. Start By Giving
“True generosity is an offering; given freely and out of pure love. No strings attached. No expectations. Time and love are the most valuable possession you can share.” — Suze Orman
One of my core values is making sure that if we are starting off any kind of relationship, I am starting it by giving value first. That could mean listening to my podcast, following me on Instagram or investing in The Estima Diet.
This for me aligns with my core values.
Business isn’t about B to B or B to C.
It is about being a real human being.
It is human to human.
Start by giving someone else useful information, a useful strategy or hack.
Take the time to think about what someone might need to move the needle and get them a little closer to their goals.
Make it easy, and make it consumable.
I spend an extraordinary time thinking about what my clients need from me.
This isn’t about being manipulative or sneaky. It is about thinking about how you can start a relationship off with anyone on the right foot.
To serve first with love, and gratitude.
In my world, whether it is healing the brain, or losing weight, people need incremental steps that are achievable.
You cannot go from beginner to competing in the CrossFit games. Nor do you lose 30 pounds in a finger snap.
What you can do is meaningfully give to people, and think about how you can create easy and achievable wins for the people you serve.
Think about all the steps the people you work with need to achieve their goal, and break it down into easy, step wise, incremental wins.
“Excellence is an art won by training and habituation. We do not act rightly because we have virtue or excellence, but we rather have those because we have acted rightly. We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence, then, is not an act but a habit.” — Aristotle
Success is not an overnight thing. And you do not do it alone.
The path to success is marred in hard work, mentorship, community and productivity.
While some of these you may have heard before, remember, common sense is not always common practice.
These lessons have been honed by the world’s leading experts in life, business, and relationships for maximum productivity, momentum, and happiness.
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